So many nights I have stopped for fast food after a drag event. I can recall tacos in drag a real past time that I admire. I used to date this girl. She was beautiful, soft spoken, and vibrant. She didn’t care I was a drag queen and would go out with me to events. She would keep me in check throughout the night. She followed the rules:
-always call me by my drag name
-always say yes to free drinks
-let me know my boobs are straight.
On the way home one night, we had in fact stopped for tacos, but we also had way too much tequila. Tequila is a funny liquor, it makes you do things you never would have. In my girlfriends case she supposed I didn’t want her to wait at a stop light. You guessed it! ILLEGAL U-TURN…through an abandoned parking lot. Being in Westminster, Colorado the police are very strict. We pulled over. Watching the hot policeman approach the vehicle, I had a plan. Looking over at my girlfriend I said, “Watch this.”
Pulling my, already miniskirt, up my thigh I exposed the double security line of my pantyhose. I placed my high heel shoe on the dashboard. Leaning my seat back a little, I plunged my face in the shadows and purked my “boobs” out. I looked like a fabulous street walker. The policeman looked into the car. He began to grin when he saw my thigh. He asked if we knew why he had pulled us over. He told us to wait he was going to get his partner.
Looking at my girlfriend, she was disgusted at men. “What are you doing?” she asked. I didn’t want a ticket and neither did she.
The policeman approached the car. “This is my partner.” said the first policeman. “Here is our business cards in case you two girls get lost. Give us a call we will rescue you.”
Moral: They say cover girl doesn’t cover boy. But a pair of pantyhose and some dark car shadows will get you out of a traffic ticket.
*note- Really don’t try this, I just happen to have phenomenal thighs in a pair of stockings